Every December, we hear from hearing parents, teachers, and grandparents who want to do something for the Deaf children in their lives but feel like they don’t know where to start. Sign language can feel huge from the outside — a whole language you don’t speak, with grammar that doesn’t match English, and a community whose etiquette you’re afraid of getting wrong.
Here’s what we tell them: start small, start now. Five signs you can learn in an afternoon will do more good in a Deaf child’s holiday than five hundred signs you’re still planning to learn next year.
These are five signs that show up constantly during the holiday season. Practice them in a mirror until they feel natural. Then use them.
1. MERRY CHRISTMAS
This is the signature holiday phrase, and it’s easier than it sounds. Sign MERRY by sweeping your open hand from your chest outward and slightly upward, twice, with a smile. Then sign CHRISTMAS by holding one hand flat (palm down) and tracing a sideways C-shape over the top of your other forearm — like drawing the curve of a wreath above a horizontal branch.
Watch a video: Handspeak: Merry Christmas
2. HAPPY HOLIDAYS
If you’re uncertain which holiday a family observes, this is the more inclusive option. HAPPY is signed by brushing your open hand upward against your chest in a circular motion. HOLIDAYS is signed by touching the thumbs of both flat hands to the chest, just under the collarbone.
Watch a video: Signing Savvy: Happy Holidays
3. THANK YOU
If a Deaf child hands you a gift or tells you something kind, you want this one ready. Place your fingertips on your chin, then move your hand forward and slightly down, palm up, as if you’re offering a small object toward the person. The motion is small and warm.
Watch a video: Handspeak: Thank You
4. WHAT DO YOU WANT?
This is the question every Santa asks. The sign for WANT is both hands palms-up, fingers slightly curled, drawn back toward your body once or twice — like pulling something toward you. To make it a question, raise your eyebrows and tilt your head slightly forward. Facial expression in ASL isn’t optional decoration; it’s grammar, and it’s what turns a statement into a question.
Watch a video: Handspeak: Want
5. I LOVE YOU
If you only learn one sign this holiday, learn this one. Hold up your dominant hand with thumb, index finger, and pinky extended, and your middle and ring fingers folded into your palm. The three extended fingers spell the letters I, L, and Y together. You can wave the hand slightly side to side, or just hold it up steady. It’s recognized everywhere in the American Deaf community, and it’s the one sign almost any Deaf person will receive with a smile.
Watch a video: Handspeak: I Love You
A few notes before you try them
You’ll feel awkward. Do it anyway. A Deaf child meeting a hearing adult who tries imperfectly to sign is a fundamentally different experience than meeting one who refuses. The child knows the difference. The child remembers the difference.
Eye contact matters more than handshape precision. Look at the child before you sign. Don’t look down at your hands while you’re doing the sign. The communication isn’t happening between your hands and theirs — it’s happening between your face and theirs.
If you’re wrong, the child will help you. Deaf kids are generous teachers. If you fumble a sign, most will gently correct your hand position or repeat the sign back to you with a smile. That correction is connection, not embarrassment.
Where to learn more
If these five signs feel good and you want to keep going, three free resources we recommend:
- Lifeprint (ASL University) — Dr. Bill Vicars’ free ASL curriculum, used by thousands of self-learners and college courses
- Handspeak — comprehensive sign dictionary with video clips for every entry
- Signing Savvy — well-organized video dictionary, free tier covers the basics
The holidays are the most natural starting point for learning ASL because the vocabulary is concrete and the moments are emotional. The Deaf child in your life doesn’t need you to be fluent. They need you to try.
